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7 Posts by

Matt Offerman

@ divider
February 10, 2014

Okay so our favorite show came back on the air last night! You're probably wondering what we did to celebrate.

Did we create a disease that turns people into the Walking Dead? Of course not. Did we plan out our escape route for when the zombies do show up? Again? Did we hone our ability to make delicious beer, or did we instead learn how to make vodka because beer won’t travel well during the apocalypse? No comment. Anyway, since you guys obviously can't figure it out, we played the game, “Which Walking Dead Character are We?” Duh. First off, let’s cover the easy ones.

October 28, 2013

Civil War Eye-Patched Tony Danza offers advice on family, style, and the challenges of this life. If you have a question that you can't seem to answer, this is your man.

Advice Column - Monday, October 28, 2013 (Ed. Note: Written by both Matt Offerman and Tim Marshall)
September 23, 2013
August 14, 2013

What did you do last Thursday at your job? We prohibitioned a beer barrel. Why would we do that, you ask? Because we’re professionals, first of all. And also because a bad fit on one end of the barrel caused a slow leak out of beer and a slow leak in of bugs and maggots and the like.

So we had to unfortunately dump the whole barrel. It was a sad day. Until Joe said, “Hey team, let’s prohibition this son of a gun!” We all thought, “Gee, that’s a swell idea!” Or at least I thought that. And since I had Murray, my axe, for Bring Your Axe to Work Day*...

July 31, 2013

I just completed my fifth month at Solemn Oath and still feel like the new guy. I thought maybe you guys would appreciate a little more info about who I am. I’m not great at talking about myself, so I found some questions online and answered them below. I didn’t have a traditional interview for this position, so I feel a need to answer some of these for my own peace of mind.

Some of these are from the nebulously-titled "10 Great Interview Questions" that I came across after 0.0432221 seconds of Googling, ten come from a Cosmo quiz, and ten are the questions from Bernard Pivot that James Lipton asks on “Inside the Actor’s Studio."
July 1, 2013

Originally, Solemn Oath was a barbershop quartet. Or barbtet, as we called them in the industry. Sure, John has told you about how he had an epiphany about opening the brewery while flying back from visiting Joe in SoCal. That’s all true, but what he didn’t mention was that Solemn Oath was already in existence, just in a more delicious, a capella form.

John had actually gone out to ask Joe for some more money.  The quartet was not making any of us rich. On the contrary, our one-bedroom townhouse, that we all shared, was about to get foreclosed on. But we were starving artists chasing our harmonious dream, and Joe always supported that.

June 5, 2013

I was brought on to Solemn Oath by Tim. Tim and I go way back.

I remember playing cards with Tim at a Bangladesh whorehouse in 1976. We were both on assignment tracking down opium smugglers. Tim was with the boys from Langley and I was with the Dept of Ag(riculture). The smugglers were laundering their money through the booming new industry of role-playing games.  It was a change of pace for us in the DoA, but there was a new administration that year and we were trying new things. Anyway, we spent the summer posing as RPG creators looking for investors. The city was filthy with them.